Unnecessary ramblings.

In the span of time that I've been back, I haven't actually done much. I got myself adjusted to life back home and I lazed in bed on many days instead of going out, soaking in the holiday mood and enjoying time back in the comfort of my own crib. I've met quite a number of close friends, partied a little and spent many afternoons eating chicken rice for lunch infront of the teevee with the boyfriend. :) Basically, I did all the things I couldn't do back when I'm in Perth, in a different environment altogether. What makes this really sad yet realistic is that I had to take time off to adjust myself back home, to the fast-paced life back here and to the incessant heat, efficient transport system and bustling citylife back in Singapore. And now when I have gotten myself pretty settled in, I have to prepare myself again for my departure. I'm heading back in a little over a month's time and... (no surprise here) I'm not ready. I figure it's still a tad too early to be thinking about leaving but I've always been the sort who likes to be a little more prepared, especially when departures are the hardest things in the world to do. I even got myself to search for flights that would leave a day later than my present departure flight. But... 1) Changing my flight would cost $200 more & 2) A day or two doesn't actually make much difference, I have to leave eventually. My fingers would then close the tab on the browser, it exits together with an uncontrollable yet apparent sinking of my heart. Can i don't leave? 

I was told by a really close friend of mine, who has been studying abroad for a few years to date that leaving does not get easier as time passes. You'd think since she's been doing it for quite long that it would get easier to go past the gates and board the plane bound for another island, but no it isn't. And every single time she has to do it, she still struggles with it. Knowing that I've always been the emotional sort, I am pretty certain that I'd never be able to get used to it either. What can i do anyway.... I just have to suck it up, cry buckets, wipe my tears and get over it. It's a cycle that would repeat, until I'm used to it or until I'm back home. Can't say i'm looking forward to doing so. Plus... School begins on 27th February, the actual day when I turn 21. I don't know if that is meant to be depressing, it sure sounds disheartening now. I'd probably be moping around in my room, unpacking my belongings or printing my lecture notes when the clock strikes midnight. )': #sad I've always liked birthday celebrations, always believed that one should feel special on their date of birth since it happens only once a year but i'm not sure about this year's... It seems like it's gonna be different for sure.

Today's the 10th of January.... I need to make my days count from now on. Starting from this moment, I'm going to bed in 15 minutes time before I meet Vanyo for lunch and Bob for dinner. Time's running out - I guess I can sit around and mope about how little time i have left or.... I can do something about it and seize it when I still can. I think the answer is obvious. So i'm off! Goodnight everyone :)